Lana Del Rey Was Miley Cyrus As A Teenager

Lana Del Rey and her publicity reps have been desperately trying to extinguish the flames started by the Internet after her panned SNL performance. Some of the actions made by LDR and her PR haven't really helped her social standing among the blogs that shredded her indie cred. LDR believes it's because people want to see her lose control. LDR made the statement recently followed by the singer mentioning her teenage problems with alcohol.

That's the only reason they're watching. They just want to see what happens. When I was very young I was sort of floored by the fact that my mother and my father and everyone I knew was going to die one day, and myself too. I had a sort of a philosophical crisis. I couldn't believe that we were mortal. For some reason that knowledge sort of overshadowed my experience. I was unhappy for some time. I got into a lot of trouble. I used to drink a lot. That was a hard time in my life.

So Lana's adding some new information to her Lizzy Grant backstory. It appears that she was another Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton or Miley Cyrus in her younger years. Probably not the best thing to mention when trying to win back fans. Also, her reasoning behind her "alcohol problems" is stupid. I hate when people try to add philosophical meaning behind their abuse problems. She did it because she couldn't believe we're mortal? Please. She did it because she wanted to get her drink on like most teenagers. What other trouble did Del Rey get into? Most likely it's been portrayed on Gossip Girl at some point.

Del Rey says that she doesn't plan on performing for crowds larger than 900 people at this time. I'm just wondering if this is nerves more than anything. Her PR will probably spin it as she's not stardom crazy, but whoever's running that Facebook page has done an extraordinary job. Over 477K likes?! I'm barely breaking 170 with my Earbuddy Facebook Page. That was my excuse for a cheap plug.

In other Del Rey news, Bradley Soileau, the New York male model used as LDR's co-star in her "Born 2 Die" video, came under some questioning in the midst of the SNL controversy. People wanted to know if he was sprouting wood during the "Born 2 Die" video while embracing a topless Del Rey.

Embracing her [Del Rey] was easy. Everyone asks the same question, did you have a boner? Ha! No, I didn't. There's a huge crew of people staring at you shouting, moving around, bright lights everywhere. Madness.

Did anyone ask the follow-up, "If the cameras were not around, would you have popped a boner then?" Or was Soileau just speaking aloud casually while no one was really paying attention. I thought most male models are gay anyway, so he would probably not get a boner. And before the male models that read this jump on me for calling them gay, I said "most", not all, you homophobes. Get back to looking pretty in your underwear.

So to sum everything up: Lana Del Rey was Miley Cyrus in her teens, she's playing crowds no larger than 900 people, and she can't give a male model a boner. Doesn't sound like a very good week.