There are the essential albums that need to be in everyone's collection. There are the personal favorites, the ones that aren't highly acclaimed but still get played every once in a while. And then there are the albums that you stick in the back of your collection because you want to forget that you spent money on them. "Own It or Disown It" gives the writer the opportunity to look at such discarded albums and determine if they are diamonds in the rough or if they deserve to be used as mini-frisbees.
The fascinating thing about 50 Cent is how consistently and phenomenally boring he is despite the curveballs that life has thrown at him. Consider the following: he was selling drugs at the age of 12, got shot 9 times when he was my age, became a personal project for two of the most powerful men in the music business, started his own record label at 28, feuded with practically everyone at some point (including rap-feud veteran Nas and the jovial Ghostface Killah), starred in a video game in which he took down the Taliban after they stole a piece of jewelry from him, and slept with both Vivica A. Fox and Chelsea Handler. You’d think that he would have grown a personality at some point, or at least be able to tell a good story. Even by the gangster-rap standards, though, his music is narcissistic and repetitive, usually not even taking advantage of his few unique qualities such as his deep voice and unusual life story (see above). When a member of G-Unit started becoming interesting, they would immediately become dead to Fiddy. Hell, he couldn’t be arsed to come up with an ethos for G-Unit in the first place—they were a bunch of dudes who rapped about how they would kill anyone who brought up any sort of criticism of the group, no matter how valid. Even the Insane Clown Posse had a better concept than that.
A broken clock is right twice a day, though, and sometimes, quality work can spring from the most unexpected projects. Get Rich or Die Tryin’ was a forgettable album bolstered by recognizable production—“In Da Club” wasn’t a hit because of 50 Cent, that’s for sure. Get Rich or Die Tryin’ was also the name of a semi-autobiographical film about Fiddy’s life and was directed by Jim Sheridan, whose other credits include My Left Foot, a critically-acclaimed film about a guy who could only move…well, guess. As it turns out, 50 Cent is no Daniel Day-Lewis, and while Get Rich or Die Tryin’ made its money back, it wasn’t the smash hit that some predicted it would be. The Get Rich or Die Tryin’ soundtrack is the best product to sport this ridiculous title, and sees most of G-Unit acting competently for its runtime.
Opening track “Hustla’s Ambition” is exactly the kind of song that 50 Cent should have spent his entire career making. The line “I sold everything, I’m a hustler, I know how to grind/Step on grapes, put them in water, and tell you its wine” alone has more wit and characterization than any of Fiddy’s proper albums, and the beat complements Fiddy rather than work to mask his faults. It’s hard to believe that this is the same guy who thought that “Candy Shop” was worth a damn.
After that stunner (and its surprisingly-good follow-up track, “What If”), the album becomes more of a social affair than anything else. Eight of these tracks are credited with guest stars, but they may have been better off just crediting everyone equally. “Things Change” is officially a Spider Loc (who?) song, but you wouldn’t know that by listening to it, especially since both 50 Cent and Lloyd Banks, G-Unit’s professional mannequin, show him up. “You Already Know” is equally nebulous, and by the time you get to “I Don’t Know, Officer” (by 50 Cent featuring Lloyd Banks, Prodigy, Spider Loc (who?), and Ma$e), you’ll probably just credit every song to G-Unit as a whole.
When my biggest issue with an album is its liner notes, though, I know that I’m dealing with quality work. “Window Shopper” is the album’s only sore point, but I seem to be the only person who didn’t like that song, so you might actually like this album more than I do. If this had been released under a different name and credited to G-Unit as a whole, everyone involved in the album’s creation would likely be a whole lot richer today. Let me put it this way: even the Tony Yayo song is kind of good. That’s a small miracle all by itself.
VERDICT: OWN
I’m breaking this column’s format next week, when I take a look at a high-profile mainstream release that came out in the past month. Will I be paying tribute to one of my new favorite albums of all time, or will I deconstruct a recent candidate for the title “worst album of all time”?
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